Artist: Half Man Half Biscuit http://www.hmhb.co.uk/ Track: Asparagus Next Left Album: Achtung Bono Tabber: Woodshed INTRO Riff A A D G A D G e|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| B|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| G|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| D|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| A|--0--0-0-5--5--2-3-2-3-2------|----0--0-0-5-5-5--2-------------------| E|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| A D G A D G e|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| B|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| G|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| D|------------------------------|--------------------------------------| A|--0--0-0-5--5--2-3-2-3-2------|----0--0-0-5-5-5----------------------| E|------------------------------|------------------3-------------------| A D G We've just been performing a guerilla gig A D G In the middle of another group's guerilla gig A D G Well, surely that's the ultimate guerilla gig A D G But still they cried like girls C C B A G Road signs on our country lanes may G D Not be what they seem C C B A G Asparagus next left who says G D "I've been up stream" C C B A G Going down there for plum tomatoes G D It's not a good idea C For 'horse manure 200 yards' read D 'Bottomless perdition' Riff A A D G When the club versus country dispute arose A D G Small children were trampled in the exodus A D G We all knew someone at primary school A D G Who had a really powerful magnet C C B A G New potatoes this a way an G D Arrow points innocently C C B A G Dirt track to a darker place that's G D What it says to me C C B A G Last chance for hanging baskets G D There even giving you clues C Fresh broad-beans and aubergines D Euphemisms, Audrey, euphemisms GUITAR SOLO G C e|---------------------------------------------------------------------| B|------------5---------------5------3---------------------------------| G|--5/7--7--7---7----7--7---7---7--4---5-------------------------------| D|---------------------------------------------------------------------| A|---------------------------------------------------------------------| E|---------------------------------------------------------------------| G C e|---------------------------------------------------------------------| B|------------5---------------5------3---------------------------------| G|--777--7--7---7----7--7---7---7--4---5-----------5/\-----------------| D|---------------------------------------------------------------------| A|---------------------------------------------------------------------| E|---------------------------------------------------------------------| G C e|--3--3-3-----3-3--5-3--------------3-3---5-3-------------------------| B|--3--3-3-----3-3------5-3----------3-3--------5-3-----3--------------| G|--------5b7-------------------5b7-------------------5---5------------| D|---------------------------------------------------------------------| A|---------------------------------------------------------------------| E|---------------------------------------------------------------------| G C e|---3-3----3-3----3-3----3-3------3-3----3-3----3-3-3--5-3--------------| B|---3-3----3-3----3-3----3-3------3-3----3-3----3-3-3-------5-3---------| G|-------5b7----5b7---5b7-----5b7-----5b7----5b7------------------5--5---| D|-----------------------------------------------------------------------| A|-----------------------------------------------------------------------| E|-----------------------------------------------------------------------| Riff A A D G Whatever happened to the plumber's van A D G Humble amateur transit van A D G Vans have become ridiculous with their A D G Strategies and logistics C C B A G Veer soon for marmalade I G D Don't think so Joe C C B A G And why are the tractors turning G D We really ought to know C C B A G So stay alert minor roads G D Remember Phyllis ... C Ooh, rhubarb let's go D A She's still not been accounted for